pixelatedboat aka “mr bluesky”

Bluesky has now replaced twitter as the top platform for finding out if there was an earthquake in LA

Most of the world’s brightest minds are hard at work developing new ways for you to get depression from a computer

Herman Melville's "Moby Dick" has perhaps the most memorable opening line in all of Western literature: "I hope you motherfuckers like reading about whales"

Happy International Women’s Day to the most international woman of all: the woman trapped on the International Space Station

Looking at the features of the Star Fox remake, I feel like this game will be controversial

I love my job as the guy who adds a fake “keep me signed in” checkbox to every website that does nothing

It looks like Kendrick has won for now but sources tell me Drake has a devastating rebuttal planned for his performance at the Kids’ Choice Awards

Ah damn it turns out this whole political system relies on false assumptions about how big of an asshole someone could be

The real lesson of Zuckerberg and Musk is that some people are just born with loser stink on them that no amount of wealth or power will ever scrub off

Quit freaking out. Remember that in 10,000 B.C., when America had ZERO international trade, a family could afford a house like this on a single income.

Happy Mario day!

Okay I guess I can see why this new logo is controversial

I should’ve learned this by now but DO NOT use FedEx. The diseased monkeys I ordered haven’t arrived and I can’t get a straight answer on what happened to them

Quitting twitter for bluesky

My relationship with Big wasn’t the only thing I blew up that day. At the Trinity test site I detonated the first plutonium bomb, unleashing a 22 kiloton blast. Had I become Death, destroyer of worlds? Meanwhile uptown, Samantha had her hands full with her own “Manhattan project”

Abolish April Fool’s day. Society has moved past the need for April Fool’s day

Me: I voted for Donald Trump because I had him confused with that other guy. Donald Duck.
NYT reporter: Are you sure you want me to print that next to your real name and a drawing of you?
Me: Yes.

Every time I read The Great Gatsby, the final paragraph brings me to tears. Breathtakingly powerful writing:

Can’t believe he said this, seems somewhat disrespectful

This probably isn’t the developers’ top priority (although it should be), but I’d love to see the Bluesky app have an option to switch to the Julian calendar for those of us who reject the lies of Pope Gregory XIII

I would rather die than create an account to continue

This is not the time for wild speculation about what happened. It’s time to bet on Kalshi about what happened

Pretty much everything this guy does that isn’t currently a crime needs to become a crime

The Serfs (youtube.com/theserfstv) @theserfstv.bsky.social

Elon Musk privately DM'ed YouTuber Tiffany Fong and asked her to be inseminated by him. When she refused he unfollowed her on Twitter and cut off premium ad revenue payments of $42,000 a month

A reminder to please always add alt text to images as a service to users like me who can’t recognise any celebrity who became famous in the last ten years