pixelatedboat aka “mr bluesky”

The Enhanced Games are bullshit. They’re still banning runners from competing using the most powerful drug of all: being in a car

I’m bored of the “is bluesky an echo chamber” debate, we need a more exciting one: is bluesky an evil haunted carnival?

I’d like to thank the BBC for trusting me to take over as showrunner of Doctor Who. I’ve got some big changes planned which I’m sure fans will love! For starters, instead of an alien from space, Doctor Who will now be a private investigator in Southern California who drives a Pontiac Firebird

I respect Steven Spielberg for never explaining why Matt Damon turns into an old man at the end of Saving Private Ryan. An odd note of magical realism in an otherwise straightforward film!

It’s great that since anyone who has ever been to New York at all counts as a New Yorker, we can all share in this victory ❤️

Stop telling those of us who enjoy raw milk that the milk contains cow shit. We know. That’s why we drink it!

It’s notable that the US Department of War hasn’t won a war since 1945

Either a heartwarming story or a Lynchian nightmare

Wait you’re telling me California from the Red Hot Chili Peppers songs is a real place??

Inspired by the Enhanced Games I am launching NASCAR for drunk drivers

Much like the New York Knicks, whether you’re a fan of Iran or not you have to respect the hustle. They just wanted it more.

Unbelievable. I was told this man passionately loves children

ABC News Australia @news.abc.net.au

Breaking: Musk's X admits noncompliance with Australian child protection request

Elon ​Musk's social media company X Corp has ​admitted ‌to not complying with an order from Australia's eSafety commissioner to ⁠provide information about the measures it has in place ​to stop ‌child exploitation on the X platform.

Home Depot and the estate of Stan Lee have announced a new partnership to bring Lee back through the incredible power of a shovel

She’s confirmed what we all thought at the time: he couldn’t think straight because he was jacking off behind that lectern

The Guardian @theguardian.com

Jill Biden says she thought Joe Biden was having a stroke during 2024 debate

Jill Biden says she thought Joe Biden was having a stroke during 2024 debate

In CBS interview set to air Sunday, former first lady says she was ‘frightened’ during husband’s debate with Trump Jill Biden said she had been “frightened” as she watched Joe Biden’s faltering performance during his 2024 presidential debate, and thought her husband might have suffered a stroke. “I was frightened, because I had never, ever seen Joe like that before or since. Never,” the former first lady said in a 30-second clip of an interview with CBS, set to air on Sunday. Continue reading...

Nothing tastes better than a home-cooked meal when you separately DoorDashed each ingredient 🤤

Reply to @bencollins.bsky.social

Fair point, but once they achieve economies of scale it’ll be possible for even people on modest incomes to be blown up in space

I see Americans have become so “soccer-pilled” by the World Cup that they’re now booing the general concept of basketball

Reply to @pixelatedboat.bsky.social

“Nooooo, having a gun keeps me safe from the people who want to murder me” buddy have you heard about being shot in the back

Excited to hear that Microsoft is pivoting to exclusively making those soft porn anime games that clog up the Switch store

Although President Trump adding his own name to the Kennedy Center was undeniably gauche, it remains true that the center should have a name that appeals to everyone, not just Democrats. I propose that it be rechristened the “Lee H. Oswald and John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts”

You couldn’t make Scary Movie these days, due to wokeness

While they’re up there they should remove JFK’s name too, the philandering pig!