*scientists frantically calculating the exact speed you need to jog through a museum in order to cheat death*
please stop booing I have a lot of speech to go
listen up graduates
Great American State Fair officially downgraded to Fair American State Poor
our pool is bigger than skyscrapers
bigger than cars
bigger than the moon!
you can tell, at night! the moon falls all the way in
you can see it at the bottom
our scientists are working on a way to extract the moon from the pool and unlock its resources
(cheese, footprints, discarded flags)
in case you were wondering how my son’s first eighteen months have been going here is a cabinet meeting exploring that concept www.theatlantic.com/magazine/202...
the only depths to which they will not sink are the ones that would give us useful data www.nytimes.com/2026/06/01/c...
most important, the district should be red all over. That’s the color a map turns when it’s healthy
Reply to @petridishes.bsky.social
a piece inspired by this concept www.theatlantic.com/newsletters/...
this deal keeps getting worse all the time
“Hello! You’ve probably been seeing all our wafer-thin shadow-docket rulings with long dissents attached and saying, Well, after reading this, I know why these rulings are wrong, but why are they right?”
all we can know about the president medically is that on the day of his examination he failed to eat 22 apples www.washingtonpost.com/politics/202...
Mrs Dalloway said that she would Instacart the flowers herself www.nytimes.com/2026/05/27/b...
still haunted by this filmgoing experience www.theatlantic.com/newsletters/...
oh! well in that case
Supreme Court keeps not explaining and so i tried my best www.theatlantic.com/newsletters/...
Come for the art, stay for the column! www.theatlantic.com/magazine/202...
Reply to @petridishes.bsky.social
a piece exploring this concept www.theatlantic.com/newsletters/...
HUSH NAYSAYERS THE BALLROOM WOULD HAVE FIXED EVERYTHING